A Little Bit of This and A Little Bit of That

A Day Late & A Dollar Short...  I guess it's Weigh in Wednesday on a Thursday!  But I actually did weigh in yesterday, I just didn't blog about it.  Anyhoo, I've maintained my weight for the last 2 weeks.  Yay me with all the travelling and junk I've eaten.  I have no goals other than to continue to maintain until our life can slow down and we're not on the road as much.  Since E was paid today I'm no longer a dollar short (at least for a few days!).

Life on the road....  We've been making 4 day weekend trips up to Iowa/North Western Illinois to spend time with E's mom Jeanette.  She has Acute Myloid Luekemia.  U of Iowa Hospitals sent her home a few weeks ago stating there was nothing else to be done and gave her a few weeks.  She's spent the last week and a half home and surrounded by loved ones but is now in the Clinton hospital with pnemonia and fever (through the grapevine) we've heard she doesn't think she'll be back home.  We haven't actually talked to her since we want to give her time to rest but we are speaking ot family members daily on her condition.  We'll be driving up there tomorrow for the weekend.  E is having a hard time with it and not sleeping well, I have my tearful moments thinking about all the time I've spent with her and all the great recipes she's shared wiht me over the years.  J doesn't have a clue other than grandma is in the hospital and sick.  He continues to pray that she feels better and we try to re-direct that she's comfortable and with loved ones.  I'm so sad that he's too young to remember her.  I know she loves him so much and when he's being his goofy self she's said to him "your dutch".  To this day I have no idea what that means but it really warms my heart because it's something my grandma Malone used to say to me as a kid.  As an adult she loved to tease me about how I would pout and say "I am Not!"  I'm glad his grandma could tie me to my grandma. 

Last weekend was a good weekend with her.  The entire family was together in their house for a wonderful steak & shrimp dinner with loaded sides.  A Christmas in August with the best gift of being together as a family.  E's sister J arranged to have someone come in and take family photos.  Instead of all of us going into the formal living room (you know the one that no one is allowed in) where everyone would have fit we decided to pile into the den....the place where we always gathered as a family.  It was a really good day with family, fun, laughter & a few rowdy games of dice....family the way it's intended! 

Here are some of the pictures:  Grandma & Grandpa with the Grands

G & G with the kids & spouses

The entire gang

The Smith's with The Smith's

With all of this travelling Jonner hasn't been doing too well.  A few weeks ago he woke up vomiting and later that day it turned to diahrea.  Poor kid was sick almost every day.  Originally we thought he had a bug but after a trip to the doctor we were figured out it's gastrotitis.  Nothing contagious and not caused by all the travelling.  Last night was our 1st barf free night in 10 days and today was diahrea free!  Yay!!!  The poor kid was put on a beige diet, but hey if it works I'll spoon feed him applesauce & toast for weeks until his irritated intestines are back to normal. 

Lately we've had several people asking us about the adoption.  Sadly we really don't have anything to share, we're still in waiting.

  Continued prayers are appreciated. 

Weigh in Wednesday - wk 5

This has been a crazy week with a lot of travelling, hotel's, hospital & restaurants.  I'm estatic I lost 1/2 a pound.  I didn't do very well planning snacks & meals and I didn't journal a thing I ate.  And my exercise was non existant unless you count an hour and a half of playtime in a hotel pool with a 3yr old hanging off of me.  Ok...that WAS a workout, and a lot of walking the cooridors of U of I Hospital.  The coming weeks will be full of more of the same, so if nothing else I've learned what not to do! 

My main goal for this week is to be accountable for what I eat, and I know the best way for me to do that is by journalling, making sure I have healthy food choices available in the house and healthy options while we're on the road and away from home. 

I'm keeping it short today....above mentioned 3yr old is sitting on my lap asking to be held.  I know that this phase of wanting to be with mom will come to an end before I'm ready for it to be over so I'm going to soak it up now while I can. 

Quick update - Adoption & MomS

On the adoption front.  Our facebook networking paid off a little bit.  Eric had a co-worker approach him a few weeks ago asking if we were still trying to adopt.  When he told her we were she said she knew of a young lady attending college that recently found out that she was pregnant and was considering having an abortion.  Eric called me and that same day I made a flier for the co-worker to give this young lady.  After hearing about this young lady I started praying for her every day and I didn't let my hopes get up, but I wanted God to know I thought of her and wanted her to make the right decision for her whether it meant abortion, adoption or parenting the child herself.  Yesterday we found out that she had called Eric's co-worker last week and decided to keep and parent her child.  Sadly we found out yesterday that she miscarried her baby.  My heart is very heavy for her.  I know she had a big decision to make and she didn't make a hasty decision and now her baby is gone.  Please say a prayer for this young lady that she may have peace with this loss. 

We continue to be hopeful and know that God has our child picked out and it's just a matter of time, trust & patience.  The later is the most difficult, we're ready for our new little bundle of joy!

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We'll be making another quick trip up to Iowa City this weekend to see Jeanette.  After a month in the hospital and a round of chemo she was released to go home.  She was only able to spend a week there as blood results came back that the chemo hadn't worked like hoped and she still had Acute Myloid Luekemia.  Last week she returned to University of Iowa Hospital as an out-patient (Hope Lodge) for another month and round of chemo.  She had a set back over the weekend and spiked a fever putting her back into the hospital as a patient and stopping the chemo.  A bacteria was found in one of the ports for the chemo and she was put on antibiotics.  During this time her blood/oxygen level dropped and she had to have her oxygen levels bumped up.  Her blood/oxygen levels have returned to somewhat normal and she's back to just a tube in her nose instead of the mask.  The bacteria is clearing up and next week they will start giving her a stronger dose of chemo.  She's sounded very tired and worn out the times we've talked and Gerry said he's never seen her so sick.  I'm praying Jonner get's to see her, but not getting my hopes up.  I worry about her low to non-existent immunity and whatever little germs he might be carrying around with him.  Please say a prayer for MomS to recover and be cancer free and for the rest of the family traveling to be with her. 

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On a happy note Eric starts 3 wks of vacation on Monday.  He's already said the phone is getting turned off.....it's on it's last leg, so that's not to hard to do anymore!  We really haven't got much planned other than a lot of fun & family time together.  I'm hoping the temps stay low and we can take Jonner fishing and we've talked about a trip to Memphis & Branson but we'll see.  It'll be nice having daddy home and sleeping in! 

Weigh in Wednesday - wk 4

Can you believe it's Wednesday again?  I'm happy to say I've had a really good week.  I feel good and I've been sleeping really well.  It's been a long time since I can honestly say I've had a good nights sleep and let me tell you being a mom sleep is NOT over rated!  A big thank you to Jonner for finally sleeping through the night! 

Like I said above I had a good week, my previous goals were:  (I need to constantly remind myself!)

• to love myself and be happy with even the littlest accomplishments, make time for myself both physically & emotionally.
• be a soda free home
• make it to a Weight Watcher's meeting
• fit a 30 min. workout in 3x a week
• journal my food

We continue to be soda free for the most part.  I've found myself craving a Diet Coke these last few days but I think it's because I don't really care for the Crystal Light flavor I have in the frige.  It's time to just dump it out and make up something I do like and I think that will take care of the soda cravings.  I also made it to a WW meeting.  I really enjoyed the smaller meeting and felt a sense of community within the group which is something I didn't feel at the meeting center when I attended back in March.  I also really liked the leader, she took time with me to go over the plan again and answer my questions and concerns.  And when she didn't have an answer she asked the other WW associate who did have the answer for me.  I look forward to going back (good or bad on the scale) and getting more great tips & suggestions from the leaders and fellow members.  My self loathing is decreasing, I still have moments but they are becoming fewer and I'm concentrating on me and my happiness and I know my behavior will reflect on those around me and make all of our lives a bit easier and more enjoyable.  I haven't actually had a 30 min workout, but I have mowed the grass and taken Jonner for a walk around the block.  We walk at a snails pace so he can investigate his surroundings and we've taken time to visit with some neighbors, but I'm going to count it as a little bit of physical and a lot of emotional "workout" for the good.  Jonner and I have also taken advantage of the slight cooler temps and have played outside.  I don't know how many times I've walked the length of the yard and I fit in a few squats & jumps in during our play too.  I'm up and moving, Yay!  Saving the best for last I've lost 4.5 pounds this week (on my home scale)!!!  I know jounaling my food has been a tremendous help....as much as I hate doing it, it really does work for me. 

My plan is to continue with what I'm doing.  Right now it's working and I need to feel like I've got a hold of what I'm doing and know that I can be successful at right now and not worry about two weeks from now, next month or even further into the future. 

Nature's Bounty

Sunday afternoon I was laying on the couch watching a race with Eric and trying to avoid having to make supper.  I didn't plan ahead and the only thing in the house that didn't need to be thawed was tuna helper.  I was not excited about having or making tuna helper so I was hoping Eric would get up and make himself a bowl of cereal and I could say "Oh, great idea!  Cereal for supper!"  He didn't get up and get a bowl of cereal....little did I know we didn't have cereal in the house either!

Anyway, I did eventually get up and I walked out back with the dogs and decided to check on my garden.  Calling it a garden this year is a stretch!  We had such a cold & wet planting season everything got in late and then it turned hotter than hot and scortched everything!  But to my surprise this hot, steamy Sunday afternoon this is what I found!

I picked my lone pepper and the two okra's and beautiful roma tomato's and the green one fell off the vine and I decided to show it some mercy and bring it in with my bounty rather than leave it for the squirels.  This little box made me so happy!  I nearly skipped into the house to show it off to Eric and Jonner, they were equally excited with my basket of veggies fresh from the garden!  I enjoy gardening, but this is what I LOVE about it.  Having my own fresh/organic vegetables to feed and nurish my family.

I quickly decided we were having BLT's for supper that evening....the only problem what we were out of the B.  I grabbled the keys, gave my guys a kiss and said I'll be back in a jiffy and off I was on my way to Walmart up the street.  I didn't even realize until I was trying to walk from the van into the store that I was still wearing my nasty, dirt crusted gardening flip-flops that flipped and flopped off my feet more than they stayed on!  But it was a Sunday afternoon and all the crazies were out at Walmart - I fit right in!  I grabbed a pound of turkey bacon and a package of deli turkey.  Those of you who know me well know I won't eat a tomato to save my life...ironic huh?!  And I was home in no time flat and ready to make supper.   Eric had his traditional BLT and I had my traditional BLTurkey, Jonner enjoyed toast and bacon.  Best of all we ended up having a nice easy sit down meal as a family - that's better than cereal any day....even if I do have to toast some bread and cook up some bacon! 

Eric has back to back ballgames tonight and he requested BLT's for a light supper before his games.  I'm happy to oblige.  It's an easy meal we all enjoy.  Just another perk of summer:  family, ballgames & BLT's, life is good! 


Here are a few pictures of our recent trip into STL to watch the Cardinals play.  A big thanks to the March of Dimes for free tickets.   

Cardinals vs. Houston Astros - Cards lost, but we still enjoyed ourselves despite the 100 degree tempature at 7:15 in the evening.  Thankfully we were so high up in the nose bleed seats that we had a slight breeze as the sun set behind us.  Up that high we had a fabulous view of the entire stadium, the field and one of our favorite sights of the midwest.  The Gateway Arch at sunset. 

At the end of my rope

This week has been a short one for us here at home, but it's been a crazy one.  I don't know if it's because of the quick trip up to Iowa and getting out of our routine or just what, but Jonner has been out of sorts.  And by out of sorts I mean extremely naughty and mouthy.  I've reached the end of my rope and I'm praying we can get back on track this weekend. 

I can't complain about his sleeping habits because the last few weeks he's been sleeping like a champ.  No potty accidents, staying in his bed and sleeping until 7am.  We stopped letting him fall asleep to his tv being on and I think it's made a huge difference and helped him sleep better.  But boy oh boy does he give me a run for my money during the day.  And then once daddy is home he's back to being a good little boy. 

Why does he think it's ok to be mean and hateful towards me but not towards daddy?  Let me give you a run down of this weeks naughty behavior.  A few days ago he played in the toilet with a washcloth.  Toilet water was everywhere, again today playing in the toilet.  I've already removed everything from the bathroom I could possible imagine...even the shower curtain is gone.  My next resort is just locking him out of the bathroom and making him come tell me when he has to go potty so I can unlock and supervise him.  He is constantly telling me "no", hitting, kicking.  Today in the library he was climbing on the magnetic thing that beeps at the door and I told him to get off that it wasn't something to climb on.  I started to re-direct him to the children's library and he yelled "no, knock it off mommy" and hit & bit me then said "mommy you're stupid".  I took him by the hand, we immediately returned the movie we were checking out and walked out the door.  He cried the whole way and frankly I didn't really care.  Once buckled in the car I asked him if he knew why we left and he just cried and yelled at me that he wanted to go to the library.  He proudly told daddy of his bad behavior as soon as we met with him for lunch and daddy made him appoligize and had a talking to him. 

I know that when he's mis-behaving I've caught myself telling him to "knock it off" so I know where he get's that from, but calling people stupid has me stumped.  I need to figure out some sort of behavior strategy for him.  I'm thinking his a monetarily driven kid so it's going to be something with coins.  He has no idea what money is, he just likes to collect it in his piggy bank.  So I'm going to find a jar and start taking coins away everytime he says a "bad" word.  I wish I could figure something out that would reward a good/alternate bahavior but right now I'm so agitated with him that I'm at a loss.  *Ideas/suggestions are welcome.* 

I know I've made and will continue to make mistakes with him, at the end I just want to be a good mom and raise a confident, caring & respetful child.  The funny thing is he know's when he's misbehaving and we have to leave a situation because of his behavior.  He will cry "I want to behave" because he doesn't want to miss out on the fun things.  I just can't understand why he continues to do what he does when he know's he's in the wrong. 

I love the little booger, he's made me laugh, he's made me cry, he's made me proud and today he's leading me to pulling my hair out. 

Weigh in Wednesday - Wk 3

Another week has gone by and it's time to weigh in again.  I'm beginning to dread Wednesdays, but I know like everything else "this too shall pass" until next week! 

My goals for last week didn't seem too lofty when I made them, but I'm wondering if I haven't put too many goals on myself because I'm not able to check each one off.  So this week I'm not going to add new goals.  I need to accomplish what I've already set out to do before I can continue on. 

My previous goals were:

• to love myself and be happy with even the littlest accomplishments, make time for me both physically and emotionally. 
• be a soda free home
• make it to a Weight Watcher's meeting
• fit a 30 min. workout in 3x a week

Did I succeed?

• I made time for me emotionally last weekend with my trip to Iowa.  I had a wonderful time with family & friends and felt completely refreshed and ready to start a new week.  YAY!
• We continue to be a soda free home.  I will admit I did have a couple of soda's over the weekend with meals but I'm not going to get worked up about those 2 drinks.  And the cravings have stayed away!  YAY!
• I did TRY to go to a WW meeting, but the a/c is broke at the meeting center and due to the extreme heat they've adjusted their hours.  So I need to get online and look for a time at an alternate meeting space that will work for me.  I did finally weigh myself today and I'm gulp: 11 lbs. heavier today than the last time I weighed in at WW in March.  I started tracking my points today and I hope to continue with tracking the food I eat in an effort to be accountable and remember what I'm eating. 
• I didn't get a single workout in last week.  BOO! 

I bought myself the Magic Bullet yesterday in hopes to whip up some yummy smoothies.  When my sister Bobbi visited last month she brought hers and made me fantastic breakfast smoothies every morning as a meal replacement.  She's eating better and attending a boot-camp and looking great, so I'm going to try to follow her lead.  I also bought myself a jar of PB2.  It's powdered peanut butter and delishious!  Best of all a serving of 2 Tbsp is only 1 WW pt! 

I feel like I'm heading in the right direction, but taking teeny-tiny baby steps.  I hope that I can keep up with what I've started this week and it'll reflect on the scale.